Baby Boomers and their Grown-Up Kids
Posted on July 17, 2015 by Lou
Cindy: My son’s depressed. Works part-time. No relationship. I want to get him into therapy.
Sheila: Where’s he living?
Cindy: Back with us at home. He knows he’s always welcome.
Sheila: So much potential. What happened?
Cindy: He’s having a hard time lately. Can’t get the right job. And he was rejected by his girlfriend. He thinks she was seeing other guys.
Sheila: How do you know all this?
Cindy: He talks to us about it. We’re pretty close.
Sheila: Sometimes I get the sense that you know too much.
Cindy: What are you saying?
Sheila: You know, that you and your son are too enmeshed.
Cindy: What do you mean by that?
Sheila: Look, I don’t want to offend you, but did you ever think he’d be better off if you weren’t quite so involved in his life?
Cindy: You know you’re pissing me off.
Sheila: It’s hard to talk about this with you. But maybe he needs more separation from his parents.
Cindy: That’s why I want him in therapy. So he can work these things out. I think I found the right therapist for him.
Sheila: Can he afford it?
Cindy: We decided to help him out.
Sheila: It’s hard to let go, isn’t it?
Cindy: Huh….Well, of course. Remember, we used to go to all his soccer games. Those were great times. And anyway, he needs our help.
Sheila: I’m not saying we should abandon our kids, but maybe just get a little distance.
Cindy: Sounds to me like you’re jealous. Just because you and your daughter rarely talk.
Sheila: Yea, maybe you’re right.
Cindy: Well thanks for admitting it.
Sheila: But let me just say one thing and I’ll let it drop. It’s painful to watch our kids fail. Reminds us too much of our own disappointment and despair.
Cindy: You know what. I don’t want to talk about it anymore. Let’s order.
Sheila: I hope you’re not mad.
Cindy: Not at all…. I hear the arugula salad is great here.